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Build It Big: Transform Your Downline Through Coaching

women helping each other out

Do you hold a vision of your team members taking greater responsibility for their businesses and being more accountable? If your answer is a resounding, “Yes,” then you are like I was before I discovered the incredible freedom and empowerment that comes with learning the right way to coach a team.

Because most of us in the direct-selling profession are self-motivated, optimistic, and somewhat driven people, we naturally carry with us the inclination to tell people what to do. After all, it is easier, faster, and usually produces results. However, when we take the position that we have all the answers, whether indirectly or directly, we inadvertently take upon ourselves the responsibility for our team members’ success or failure. Then, when their businesses don’t work, who do they blame? Us! That’s the problem. Our goal therefore is to steer others to their own answers, causing them to take responsibility for their reasons and choices and building their businesses with a sense of ownership.

Passing the Torch

The good news is that coaching is a set of learned skills. These skills increase our ability to communicate effectively with our team, inspire them beyond what they thought possible, and develop other leaders within our organizations to continue the dream. They enable us to develop relationships of mutual respect, trust, and integrity. Modeling these skills, we empower our team members and give them ownership in the solution.

The next time a team member contacts you because they are frustrated in their efforts to get bookings, sales, or recruit leads, pause before you reply. Being the leader you are, you might be tempted to jump right in and tell that individual what they need to do. That simple pause allows you to implement the principle-centered coaching skills that increase your team member’s confidence and self-esteem, and empowers them to take action. As you listen with your heart to their situation, you will be able to acknowledge specific efforts and character qualities, and respond with open-ended questions that help them tap into their own answers.

For example, after they share their struggles to get bookings at parties, you respond with an acknowledgement. In the past you might have given them a compliment: You’re awesome! This time, you acknowledge them by saying, “Your desire to serve your customers is clear!” When you notice and highlight the specific strengths of their character, you tell them I see you. In pointing out who your team members are as individuals, you help them see themselves as they truly are, which increases their confidence and self-esteem.

Resisting the urge to tell the team member what they need to do, you can move into open-ended questions. These questions illustrate your confidence in that individual’s ability to solve their own problem. They will gain clarity and insight, and begin to shift into seeing themselves as the experts. In this example, you may ask them a few questions to help them come to a solution that works for them:

  • What would you do differently next time?
  • How would you ask differently next time?
  • If your guests have similar reactions at your next party, how will you respond differently?

You’ll be amazed at the freedom you’ll feel and the wisdom that can come from the answers you receive. It won’t always be easy to stop simply providing solutions. However, you will find that it becomes easier as you practice, and especially when you observe what happens to your team! As your team members solve their own problems, they gain confidence and ownership of the future action. Watch their professionalism, activity, and demeanor build as they practice and gain the positive results of their own solutions.

Your Action Plan

Can you see the difference between telling and coaching? Do you think your results and relationships might be different if you used coaching skills? It is a paradigm shift. I recommend that you start to make the transition by using these skills in the next 48 hours:

  • Begin with “I See You”: Acknowledgements. Practice identifying at least two character traits in your team member that led to their achievement.
  • Next, practice the “You’re the Expert” Questions. Resist the urge to tell them what to do. Instead, ask what they could do or how they could do it to change the results.

This is an excerpt from the best selling book, “Build It Big” 101 Insider Secrets From Top Direct Selling Experts, brought to you by the Direct Selling World Alliance (DSWA). The DSWA provides industry-specific education, resources and support to direct sellers in more than twelve countries, representing over 275 companies.

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